*WINNER OF THE PEN ACKERLEY PRIZE 2018*

My younger brother's name is Nicholas Beard. He was nine years old, and I was with him in the water when he drowned.

Life changes in an instant.

On a family holiday in Cornwall in 1978, Richard and Nicholas are in the sea, jumping the waves. Suddenly and inexplicably Nicholas is out of his depth and then, shockingly, so is Richard. Only one of the brothers returns to the shore.

Richard does not attend Nicholas's funeral and afterwards the family return to Cornwall to continue the holiday. Soon they stop speaking of that day at the beach altogether. Years later, haunted by grief, Richard sets out to piece together the story. Who was Nicholas? What really happened that day? And why did the family never speak of it again?

SHORTLISTED FOR THE RATHBONES FOLIO PRIZE 2018

SHORTLISTED FOR THE JAMES TAIT BLACK PRIZE 2018

'This captivating book, both heart-rending and jaw-dropping, unfolds like a detective story' Daily Mail

'A memoir of real truth and heartbreaking emotional heft' Sunday Times

A memoir of exceptional power and universal relevance - about loss, carrying on, and recovering a brother's life and death.

About the Author
Richard Beard is the author of Acts of the Assassins which was shortlisted for the Goldsmiths Prize and most recently, The Day That Went Missing. In the twenty years since his first book he has published critically acclaimed novels and narrative non-fiction, including Becoming Drusilla, the story of how a friendship between two men was changed by a gender transition. He was formerly director of the National Academy of Writing in London, and is now a visiting professor at the University of Tokyo and has a Creative Writing Fellowship at the University of East Anglia. He is an optimistic opening batsman for the Authors Cricket Club.

Reviews
A memoir of real truth and heartbreaking emotional heft * Sunday Times *
This captivating book, both heart-rending and jaw-dropping, unfolds like a detective story * Daily Mail *
A touching, painful disquisition on memory and forgetting and the tendrils that tie us to the past -- Caroline Moorehead * Guardian *
Clear-eyed, very sad, funny at times and, despite the story it tells, ultimately uplifting in its determination to confront buried truths. * Sebastian Faulks *
A masterpiece * Craig Brown *


Awards
Winner of PEN/ Ackerley Prize 2018 (UK). Short-listed for The Folio Prize 2018 (UK).



Book Information
ISBN 9781784703141
Author Richard Beard
Format Paperback
Page Count 288
Imprint Vintage
Publisher Vintage Publishing
Weight(grams) 202g
Dimensions(mm) 198mm * 129mm * 18mm